The Right Question

When someone offers up their entire summer holiday, it relatively means that they are committed to whatever task they are signing on for. Last November, the phone call from my chapter changed my life around and suddenly I was on this journey to Africa. One national conference, four months of assignments, one week in Toronto for training, 22 hours of travel, three days training in Lilongwe, Malawi, 36 hours of travel, and now I am in my placement for the summer. All that time that EWB has poured into my preparation and travel, all those letters my friends and family wrote, and that huge shopping trip my Mom took me on all comes to this. The time has come. That phrase just took me back to Gandalf in LOTR, sorry for how random that is, but my headspace naturally is. If someone were to ask me for five emotions I am feeling right now, I would answer: nervous, excited, eager, lonely, and peaceful.

There is so much unsaid. During my stay in Malawi so far, I have learned that value of asking a minimum of five questions before being satisfied with the answer. There seems to be a gap between me asking a question and my counterparts fully understanding what I am getting at. I am sure this is mostly because English is not their first language. Many of the things in English make no sense for them. For example, on my plane ride to Lilongwe I was speaking to some native Malawians about their country. During our conversation, the phrase “you’ll rock their socks” slipped out, and the confusion on their faces was priceless. Even when I am not using strange catch phrases, it’s hard trying to find the real answer to my question. Whenever I ask a question, I always get a very direct, honest, short answer, but it’s not always what I am looking for. For example, if my family, friends, or EWBers asked where I am right now, I would say a guest house in Chitipa, Malawi. I answer this with the amount of detail that my counterpart is looking for. However, if I were Malawian, the conversation would probably go like this:

Q: Where are you?

A: I am sitting in bed

Q2: Where is your bed?

A2: In a house

Q3: Where is this house?

A3: In the capital

Q4: Which capital?

Q4: Chitipa

Q5: What is Chitipa?

Q5: District in Malawi

Five questions later I finally get the full depth of answer I was initially looking for. I hope that makes sense. This exercise is just to demonstrate what it feels like asking questions. My coach and I were talking this morning, before he helped me settle in Chitipa, about asking the right question. This puts a whole other swing on things, because you not only have to be meticulous about digging deeper into the conversation, you also have to begin that first question with a legitimate reason.

I have always taken communication for granted up until now. Being able to articulate a question where the recipient knows exactly what I am getting at (most of the time) is so efficient. I am really enjoying my time within the language barrier though, because I would never have seriously thought about communication unless I had!

So what is the right question to ask me right now? If someone were to ask me what I am doing here, I would answer them something like this: I am stationed in the District Hospital working with the environmental health officers trying to further understand natural leaders’ role in the Community led total sanitation status of the district. The better question is “what made you decide to spend four months 13,000 km away volunteering in an unfamiliar place where you don’t know the language and you stick out like a sore thumb”? That is the question I wish people would ask. That is the right question because it brings the conversation to a whole different level. I have a well thought out answer for that, but you will have to wait and see, because I must go buy a bicycle, flipflops, and some food from the market.

Tsalani Bwino (stay well, Chichewa) Much love,

Karina